Perplexed...That's Me!

Let me just start off by saying that I am glad to see the weekend finally get here. It has truly been a week I won't soon forget.

As the title of this posts states, I am perplexed. I am at several crossroads in life, and I have to make decisions as to what my actions will be.

I recently got a phone call from a local company offering me a job that I applied for before I became a teacher. While I can't be specific with what the job is (again, anonimity) I will say that it is still in the education field. It's just not an official teaching position.

Normally, I would say no to taking this job. They have been asking me what it would take for me to even consider taking the job. I flat out told them that they would have to match my salary. Sadly, the position they want to hire me for starts off at almost $10,000 less than I make now. Knowing that, I pretty much figured there is no way they are going to come back with an offer.

I was wrong! I got a phone call last week asking if making just $1000 less would be acceptable. Seems they have been figuring their budgets and supplemental options that would get me to my current salary, or even just $1000 less. The fact that they have been working so hard to figure out if they could match my salary says tons. They are seriously wanting me and only me for this position.

This leaves me not knowing what to do. I have tons of questions I am asking myself to try to figure this out.


Do I stay in my current role as a teacher? 

I love being a teacher. From the first day I stepped foot into the classroom, I knew that I had found my calling in life. I was meant to teach students. I was meant to be a mentor, role model, counselor, etc. I have even set goals of one day being the principal of a middle school, and someday I would become a director of a school system.

As a teacher, I truly believe that I have affected the lives of my students and their families. I know this to be a fact because I have parents and students that come back to visit me, send me updates on email, and even call me at home. I feel the love and the appreciation for what I have done for their lives.

I don't know if I can give up something like that. I always wanted to be able to make the lives of students better than they ever thought possible.

Can I do that in this new job? The answer to that is MAYBE. While I would be working with a great deal more students than the 75 I work with each year as a teacher (think several thousand each year with the new job), I would not be able to build the types of trust and relationships I build with my students. I would not be spending as much time with the masses that I do with my classroom students.


Do I want to lose the leadership roles I have come to love because of the difference I get to help make in the world?

One part of my life that I tend to keep off of here are some of the leadership roles I have undertaken in recent years. I fear of being discovered and identified by those leadership roles. Well, I will try to convey this as best I can.

Because of my leadership roles in education, I have the ability to affect change that will benefit the teachers, the students, and their families. I have the opportunity to work with teachers from across the state and country in an effort to affect that change. It began in local leadership, but my roles have grown into statewide leadership and into the national arena. With my love of politics and my love of education, I am at a point where I can see my future in this particular line of work. I would love to do lobbying for the betterment of education. There are so many areas of education that need to be looked at and improved, and I can be one of the voices to get that change implemented.

Outside of education, I also am chairman or a member of several different civic organizations. I feel I am making a place for myself. I enjoy working with these organizations. Each works to benefit the lives of our citizens in some shape or form.

Can I honestly end those relationships in exchange for this new job? Granted I would have new roles to fill, and I can even see myself leading this company in the future. I could be one of the state directors. I can see me there, and others have commented on it as well.


Do I leave the school that I have loved since the first day I walked in it?

When I say I love this school, I mean I feel a connection and an ownership of this school. We are a pretty large middle school (about 1200 students in two grades) and one of the top in the state. We have worked hard over the past 10 years to be the best. We have set high expectations for our teachers, staff, students, and their parents. We don't accept failure. We believe every student can succeed, and we instill that in our kids. I have a family-like connect to my colleagues, students, and their families. I have never felt this anywhere I have ever worked before.

There really is no good way to explain how this feels except to say that I feel loved, needed, and respected in my school and school system. That takes time to build, and do I want to start over.

The funny thing about all of this is that I have worked with this other company for about 12 years now in a volunteer capacity. I know so much more than any newbie would know coming into this position. I have connections, friendships, and community partnerships across the state because of my work with this company. I know that there is already a level of respect for me in this company. But, I will still be the newbie. Also, the role that I have enjoyed for so many years as a volunteer would be greatly affected by me taking a position with them. Do I really want to change that role? I don't know!


Other Thoughts:

Given the fact that I dream of moving to a larger city someday in the future, do I really want to take a job with this company knowing that I am locking myself into the area I am currently living in?

If I took the job with this new company, they would allow me to go back to school and pursue another degree...FREE OF CHARGE. (I would only be allowed to take two classes per semester for free, but it is better than nothing!) With me wanting to obtain my doctorate degree, do I want to give up that chance?

What are the advancement possibilities in this new company? Is it any better than in the school system? In my opinion, I would say that the opportunity for advancement is less in this new company. There are not many ways to advance unless someone is fired, promoted, or they die. Given the limited number of positions in this company across the state, I don't see me getting to move up very much or even quickly. As a teacher, there aren't many advancement opportunities either. However, I can see myself becoming a leader in education if I remain a teacher and in the leadership roles I already have.


Well, I suppose I may be answering my own questions just by venting it out here. As much as I would love to take this new job, I think I will have a much greater effect if I remain a teacher for now.

I welcome any thoughts or opinions.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend. I am off of here to head to the movies. Going to see "Cirque du Freak : The Vampire's Assistant." All of the reviews I have read say it is an awesome movie. Should be a good time.

Take care,
- JC

By the way, I have missed talking with several of you online this week. Hope you all are doing well, and hope to talk to you soon.