I am blessed in the fact I have a dad who never ceases to amaze me with his capacity for unconditional love towards his kids. I have mentioned the challenges my sister presents to my dad. She is out of control, and my dad still helps take care of her (she is 22)! She continues to take advantage of my dad, and it is killing me. No matter what she does, my dad will be there to help her out. (He definitely gets that from my grandmother. She was the same way with my drug addict uncle.)
It got worse this week when my dad informed me that my sister had stolen my dad's wedding bands. Yes, I meant that in the plural. My sentimental father had always kept his and my mom's wedding bands...even after their divorce in 1982. Yes, my 22 year old sister, who was not even around when my mom and dad were together (she was adopted from my dad's second marriage in 1988) has stolen the wedding bands of my parents. Dad had given those to me, but he had kept them for safe keeping. I am furious with my sister, and I would love nothing more than to have her arrested for theft. My dad will not do that...darned that unconditional love.
The real reason of this post is to discuss when a parent(s) don't show unconditional love for their kids.
I was at a youth conference last week, and I learned about one of our delegates who was attending. Turns out, this young man lives in my town and goes to high school just down the street from my house. All his life he had been a home-schooled child. He wants to join the Marines. Turns out that the Marines won't accept his specific home schooling, so he decided that he would finish out his academic career in a public high school. His parents did not accept his decision to go to public school and join the military. They actually kicked him out of their house. I could not believe my ears. He has been living with friends right now as he finishes high school this next year.
How can these parents, who supposedly love their son, kick him out because he wants to go to a public high school then join the Marines? It makes absolutely no sense! This is a very bright and talented young man who wants nothing more than to better himself and serve his country. They should be so proud of him.
For those asking about child protective service, he recently turned 18, so no go there.
You are not crazy. Opening the door of your house for someone in need is kind :). Not alot of people can do that.
ReplyDeleteI don't think your dad is showing unconditional love here- he is enabling your sisters bad behavior which, if it continues to go so recklessly unchecked, will only continue to hurt and harm. I do think that opening your home would be wonderful. Just be cautious.
ReplyDeleteMissed you last week.
Be wise and cautious as you consider this, but I think it's a wonderful idea. What a great influence for good you could have on him.
ReplyDeleteI was thinking about what you wrote about your dad and sister and refrained from commenting until I thought about it. Like Mandi, I was questioning whether it was unconditional love, or whether it is a refusal to stand up for her. Is this one of those times your sister needs a dose of reality, such as being arrested that will help her wake up and see what she is doing?
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like a cool idea about having the kid move in with you, but make sure that he checks out.
sometimes love means punishment. your dad loves his daught. so he needs to do something to fix her behavior. i'm sure he doesn't want her life turning to shit.
ReplyDeleteas far as the kid who got kicked out. wtf. some "parents" just don't understand what love is.