I Almost Got Married

I am sure that title made a few people take a second look.

I caught a music video today of Bobbie Cryner. She is a country music artist that had two albums in the mid-90s. I had one of her CDs back then, but have since lost it. I loved her voice...and her red hair!

As I watched the videos today, I began to reminisce. It was the red hair that brought me down the road of memories today. I thought about the woman I almost married...Gwen! 

How did you and Gwen meet? 

I met Gwen during my sophomore year of college. We both had take Dr. Owen's US History II class. I remember when I first saw her. Gwen sat right behind me in the class of about 200 students. I first noticed that she always wore hats, ballcaps, or bandanas to class. Turned out that Gwen was in remission from ovarian cancer. The hair loss, obviously, was from the chemotherapy she had received. 

I remember thinking that she was an interesting character...unlike any I had met before. To begin with, she had fought cancer and had won (to this day...still in full remission!!!). She had this outlook on life that was so rare at the time. She lived for every moment. There was never a day when she looked at the negative. Let's be honest. She had been through Hell and came out shining like a star! 

I loved her sense of humor. She always knew how to crack a joke and get me to smile. She was always the sarcastic one in the class, and she also loved to go to bat with the professor. I always said he was a better professor because Gwen kept him in check. She had brains...I found that sexy! 

In the absolute sweetest gesture, Gwen would let me copy her history homework before class began. No, I was not always a moocher. She helped me out when I would slack off, though. 

Over time, the friendship grew...so did her hair. Gwen had the most beautiful and sexiest red hair. (Did I mention I like red heads? Just a point of information!) Heck, I fell in love with her when she had no hair. The gorgeous red hair was just the icing on the cake. 

Another thing that attracted me to Gwen was her independence. When I met Gwen, she was also holding down two jobs during college. She was a McDonald's manager (hey, it wasn't beautiful, but it paid the bills), and then she became a manager at Kinkos (FREE COPIES...woo hoo!).  She worked hard to put herself through college so her single, ailing mother would not have to worry about her. 

Just a recap so far: 

(1)  Brains

(2)  Killer red hair

(3)  Awesome sense of humor

(4)  Independence

(5)  Caring/Compassionate

Did I mention she was the "older woman?" Well, she was only 2 years older than me. When you are 20, however, a 22 year old can seem older. She graduated with a Bachelors degree in English. She decided to stay at the university and get her masters degree in English, as well. That made me happy. That meant she would be sticking around here. It became a great setup. I did work-study hours in the department of English, which meant I worked in the departmental office every other day answering phones. During her masters program, Gwen also did part-time work as an adjunct professor in the English department. That's right...I was dating a college professor!

We dated for more than 2 years. We were even engaged for a short time. Sadly, she left the university to seek her doctorate in English. This meant she had to move over 7 hours away to another university. Once she told me her decision, we both decided that we would end our engagement and separate. It was a mutual decision. Neither of us was ready for marriage. 

I still think about Gwen from time to time. I can tell you that she is an English professor in a southern university. She actually focuses on British literature. I told you she had brains! She is extremely happy where she is, and that makes me happy. There are days, however, when I think about what our life would be like if we did get married. 

I think I will stop here. Other details about our relationship are not important for the sake of this posting. I am, however, finding myself foolishly smiling just thinking about Gwen. 

Oh, the "what-ifs" are setting in. Time to depart! 

Night, all!