My Merry Christmas Update

Yes, I know that it is not exactly Christmas Day just yet. However, sitting here today I have decided that I want to share Christmas plans, wishes, etc. 


Christmas Plans


I have decided to take a different route on Christmas gifts this year. I have found myself unwilling to go out and do the marathon shopping I do each Christmas season. (That would be me leaving the house at 7AM, going out for breakfast, doing ALL my shopping in one day, and getting home around 11PM...) I find it hilarious that I have lost the want or need to go shopping for all these gifts I get every year. I literally can fill up my SUV in one day. I am my mother's child, after all. 


Anyway, instead of doing the marathon of shopping I have decided to hand make ornaments for gifts. I have been researching various types of ornaments that can be made. For my dad, aunt, and uncle I am making these ornaments that have various pictures of their parents on them. My grandmother passed away in 2005 and my grandfather in 2006. I have some other really great ideas for ornaments that look pretty awesome. There is the moose made out of pine cones, the snowmen made from light bulbs, etc. My favorite ones are those that look old and traditional. I found one idea that involved taking old shirts, cutting them into strips, and placing the strips on styrofoam balls. It doesn't sound too fantastic, but the end result is incredible. Plus, it is a personal gift instead of other generic gifts I am so used to buying. 


So why the change in this year's outlook on gift giving? I don't really know. I guess I am trying to pull back from the materialistic side of it all. I am certainly not turning my nose up at buying all the gifts. I love that part of it and I especially love watching the looks on people's faces when they get a wonderful gift. I put a lot of thought into what I buy each person. I always have. This year I simply wanted to try something different. 


I will be spending Christmas Eve with my aunt and our entire immediate family. That will mean me, brother, sister (maybe), dad, aunt and uncle hubby, uncle and girlfriend, cousin K and her 3 boys, cousin P's wife and 4 kids, cousin C and his wife and 3 kids.. For those of you trying to keep count that will be 10 nieces and nephews (ages 1, 1, 3, 3, 5, 5, 7, 9, 9, 13...whew) running throughout the house. I am taking the Aleve with me just to be sure I don't get a migraine for the running and screaming of that many kids at once. 


After the celebration at my Aunt's home,  my brother and dad will actually be coming back to my house for the night. That is part of my Christmas wish since this may be my last Christmas in my home. I have lived here for 13 years and brother has never been up here to see where I live. I still can't believe he agreed to come up here for Christmas. 


I will cook a Christmas breakfast the next morn. I am especially excited about the Applewood smoked bacon I found the other day. Oh..........mouth is watering for just that alone. There will also be eggs, biscuits and gravy, fruit, etc. For dad, I will fix his traditional fried bologna. It would not be a Christmas Breakfast without it. (Hey, we are a true southern family...)


Sometime on Christmas day, my brother and I will venture out to my mother's house to celebrate with her. 


After all of that...who knows?!?!

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Christmas Wishes

I thought I would take a few moments to let some people know how much I appreciate them. Since I can't send many of you Christmas gifts (for various reasons) I thought I would use this as a quasi-present to each of you...so here we go. 

Jenny

My dearest and best friend...you know I have a love for you unlike that for any other person I know. Who would have ever guess that going to college together would end up with us having this bond that is so much more than mere friendship. We know more about each other that even our families know. We have seen each other through some of the best and the absolute toughest times in our lives. You know I will always be here for you no matter where each of us may go. I can't wait to see you soon! 

Mikey

You have been a wonderful addition to my life this year. I find it odd that I have never met you, but I feel comfortable talking to you about a variety of life topics. Thanks for being there to lend an ear and for sharing parts of your life with me. You have helped me in more ways that you may ever know. The offer still stands...when you get out to TN, you call me and I will be your personal guide through Dollywood. 

Los

My friend, you inspire me in many ways. I have enjoyed our numerous talks over the past few months. Your story of courage and strength just make me smile. I will always be here for you if you need to chat or need words of encouragement. 

Lee

Lee your words of encouragement always make me smile whenever I am the recipient. Thank you for always being so willing to offer your friendship to someone who you have never met. I look forward to learning more about you and your life out there in the western US. Take care of yourself...

Jen J

You are most certainly my favorite "call girl" of all time. (Everyone else get your heads out of the gutter...she is not that kinds of "call girl." She works in the call center where I used to work. You weirdos!) Your outlook on life makes me grin from ear to ear. You are about a southern as they come and I love you so much more for it. You are a fantastic mother and a wonderful friend. I love talking and hanging out with you. Keep just being yourself...the person that EVERYBODY loves. 

Aaron

Your life experiences are unlike anyone else's that I have ever met. Your outlook on life should be shared and adopted by everyone. You continue to keep me in awe and you continue to offer me hope and inspiration for the future. I think what just puts my jaw to the floor is the fact you are so young! Keep it up!

Dean

First of all, you are a fantastic artist. I have enjoyed getting to see the fruits of your labor. My wish for you this year is that you will finally see how great of an artist you truly are. I also hope that you are able to find the happiness that you deserve. You know I will be here for you whenever you need anything. (Ear, shoulder, etc)

Sister

Sis, while you will never read this, I needed to put this down somewhere. My wish for you is that you will FINALLY get your life in order. I hope that you will learn that there is so much more to life than the drinking, drugs, and partying. My fear is that you are close to hitting rock-bottom, but sometimes people have to get there before they will make a change. I truly love you and I want only the best for you. I wish I knew how to help you, but I feel so distant from you. Part of the reason for the distance is that you know I will tell you the truth...that your behavior is going to destroy you or someone else. Dad and your mom are willing to help you out so you can get your life together. Why do you resist both? Go get your GED and start a life...please. Do it for no one else but yourself. I will continue to pray for you to snap out of this path you are on. I do love you. 

Mikeal and Mandi

While it seems unfair to group the two of you together for this (you each deserve your own amount of praise), I feel that I would be repeating myself for much of it. So here you go. I have enjoyed learning about your lives, your story, and I look forward to seeing what the future has in store for you two. You both have opened up your lives and your home to me. That is pretty amazing in my eyes. I am honored to call you my friends. Also, the two of you are incredible parents. I could tell that when I met your children. They are as amazing as their parents. Keep up the great work and the awe-inspiring love you share. 

Evan

My wish for you is that you are able to find you place in life. I know that it is a constant struggle for you, and I really hope that God will show you the path he has for you. My wish for you is that you will also be able to make the move to the ATL and get your job with CFA. Keep looking forward and up! 

Ian

You are so brutally honest in everything you write. It is incredible. I have enjoyed reading about your life, and I appreciate all the comments you have left for me as well. You are not alone in this world. Never forget that. We will always be here to lend a helping hand, a shoulder to cry on or for support, etc. I hope that 2010 will be wonderful and unforgettable for you. You deserve that!

Chris

Thank you for sharing your story with us as well. You have a beautiful family. I am still jealous of you living up there in the northwest corner of the US. Thanks for the chats and just allowing me to consider you a friend. I look forward to getting to know more about your story and the choices you make in life. 

I know I am going to be leaving people out. As I am writing this part I am stopping to add others above. Please know that I value each and every one of you and want nothing but the best for each of you. My best wishes for you in the coming year.

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MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Do I Really See Me?

Last night I got into a discussion with a friend about "issues" we each face. 

The topic came up of how we each see ourselves. My friend, D, was describing how he saw himself and how some days he could not even look at himself in the mirror. 

The fact is that I completely understand where he was coming from with this. I feel the same exact way about me. I look in the mirror and I wonder do I really see who I am? 

I feel the need to backtrack for a moment. I have always dealt with this idea of self-loathing and extremely low self-esteem. As a kid I grew up pencil thin, almost white-blonde hair, blue eyes. Okay, I was a cute kid. Somewhere in late middle school I gained the weight. I went from being a pencil thin uber-active kid to being this pudgy, lazy, complacent slug of a teenager. 

I remained over weight most of my life. A couple years ago I decided that I had had enough of it all. It was time to fish or cut bait. (Hey, I am from the south...don't know our little whimsical sayings.) I consulted my doctor and my diet and exercise program began. I lost 85 pounds that year. I had never felt better, and I was wearing pant sizes I had not seen since my freshmen year of high school. 

Over the past couple years I have been on their weight roller-coaster. In all I have lost a total of about 130 - 150 pounds...dang roller coaster. My goal for 2010 is to see myself get below the 200 lb mark. My doctor tells me my ideal weight should be 175 - 190, so I will take his word for it. YIKES! 

Back on track here...I know that I am now wearing smaller clothes, feel better, and for all external purposes I look better than what I was. However, I rarely catch a glimpse of this newer person I have become and am working towards. I still see the bigger guy pre-weight loss. I still see all the weight still on me, and it does get me down from time to time. 

Is it my low self-esteem that keeps showing the old me in the mirror? 

Will I ever really get to see the true me in that blasted mirror? 

When I make it to my goal this year, will I be able to see it? 

Will I ever be loved by someone with the way I look? Is it possible? 

Yes, ladies and gents, I understand that the physical is only part of the whole package that is me. But, you understand the world we live in and can you honestly blame me for feeling this way? 

So on that lovely note for the night, I just want to say that I know many people struggle with this very idea. And, admittedly, D has me worried. We're here for you D! 

Below are some self-portraits painted by various artists. 

A Holiday Survey...Why Not?

1. What is your favorite holiday show?
There isn't really a specific holiday show that I must watch to make my holiday complete. However, there is one that I cannot stand to watch, and it is on all the time...A Christmas Story. This movie is a cult classic, and I understand that but I cannot watch it. I will go insane first!


2. What holiday character do you think you're most like?
Just call me Rudolph.

3. What holiday character does your spouse think you're most like?
Sorry, no spouse! Moving on...

4. Favorite Christmas/holiday song?
Mary Did You Know (Kenny Rogers and Wynonna Judd)

I am also partial to Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer since I learned the real story behind it. If you heard about why it was written, you would most certainly cry. 

5. Most hated Christmas/holiday song?
12 Redneck Days of Christmas


6. If you have an all holiday music radio station when do you start listening to it? 
It begins playing all holiday music on Black Friday. However, I begin playing holiday music in October.

7. If you have an all holiday music radio station do you love it or hate it? 
Love it. I will actually go online and stream it into the classroom.

8. Have you ever wrapped yourself as a Christmas present?
No...is my mere presence enough of the gift? 

9. Who is Rudolf The Red Nosed Reindeer's father? 
Per the television movie, it is Donner

10. Do you drive your neighborhood or one near you at night to look at other people's holiday decorations?
It's been known to happen. We will also go to the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, NC to check out their Christmas decorations. It is incredible...especially the candlelight tours at night. 

11. When you see a heavily decorated house do you think, 'oh that's lovely'? Or do you think, 'ohcriminy, that looks like Christmas threw up all over their lawn'?
It depends...it is tastefully decorated or done the Redneck way (throw it all out there on the lawn)? 

12. Are you counting the days to Christmas with excited anticipation or dread?
Since it is this Friday, there is not much left to count, but I am definitely excited!

13. When was the last time you had your photo taken with Santa? Did you sit on his lap?
Have you met my dad? Every year is spent with "Santa." I no longer sit on his lap either.

14. Do you make a Christmas list for your spouse or significant other or do you rely on them to pick your gift(s) without a clue from you?
Cash is always good for me. Moving on...

15. When do you put up your tree? 
I try to put my trees up before Thanksgiving week. 


16. Real or fake? 
This year they were all fake. From time to time I will put up a live one too.

17. When do you take your tree down?
Some time after the new year. Whenever I feel the need. 

18. Do you shop the day after Christmas sales? What do you shop for?
Yes I do. I will shop for clothes and whatever else is on sale.


19. Is your work/office having a holiday party this year? Will you attend? 
Our's was cancelled due to lackluster numbers. 

20. Do you have your New Year's Eve Plans set yet?
Not yet. Don't even know which state I will be visiting yet. Will it be Michigan, North Carolina, New York, Tennessee? Who knows? 

Finally Back Home

Well, I just got back home from my weekend excursion. As I was driving home today I got to see all the snow. The only thoughts in my head were (1) how gorgeous it all was and (2) God is good! It really is just breathtaking.

When I finally got home to see what had happened at my home I was happy to see all was okay. Yes, there was a tree that fell over from the neighbor's yard. It knocked over a utility pole and light. The light is sitting in my garage right now. The tree is sitting across the fence. Besides that, there is no damage. Just beauty.

Below are some of the pics I snapped as soon as I got here.

James Cameron is a GENIUS

I just got back from seeing James Cameron's latest creation...AVATAR.

For starters, I got to see this 3-D masterpiece at an IMAX theater with the most incredible surround sound system I have ever heard. (I love new theaters!) 

This movie is unlike any experience you will have at the theater. The scenery is breathtaking, the action and drama is non-stop, and there is something for everyone in this movie. 

My heart has not stopped racing yet. I will have to go see it again! (Probably tomorrow...I promised a good friend of mine that I would see it with her. Shhhhh. Don't tell her I already saw it without her.) 

GO SEE IT!