It is hard to explain, but I don't like gathering in social settings. I have this uncomfortable feeling in the pit of my stomach, even when it is with a group of people I know.
For instance, tonight I am supposed to meet up at my friends Amy and Dave's house. We are supposed to get together because our friend, Jason, is coming into town for the weekend. None of us have seen him in several years since he left the area to attend medical school. He is in town this weekend for a residency interview. A number of other friends are gathering at Amy and Dave's house for a small party for Jason.
I am wanting to go, but I have this sick feeling in my stomach. I am having some sort of anxiety attack just thinking about going to the party.
Why is this happening to me? I am sure there are a series of explanations, but I can't pinpoint them.
Just this past weekend I was in Greensboro, NC, visiting Jenny and her husband Chris. We all met up with Tamika and Dwayne to go see the Lion King on Tour. There was absolutely NO worries, NO sickness in my stomach, and NO hesitations!
Is this just the repercussion of low self-esteem that has plagued me most of my life? Who knows?
It remains to be seen if I will get up the nerve to go tonight or if I will stay hold-up in my house...
i know the feeling well. thank goodness for texting and FB or I would be a total hermit.
ReplyDeleteGo. Usually it is the anticipation that is the worst, and once you get there everything is fine. If it's not, politely excuse yourself. Nothing lost.
Go! Don't stress. No regrets.
ReplyDelete