Socially Inept (Part 2)

I did it! I went to the get-together last night. Yes, I still had some anxiety last night before I got there, but it soon went away when I got to see everyone. I had not seen my friend, Jason, in a few years since he moved away to attend medical school at Virginia Tech.

It was a pretty laid back night. Dave and Amy have two of the cutest kids on the planet, so we all spend some time playing around with them in the living room. Once they were in bed, the gang seemed to fall back into our old routine of board game mania. We sat at the table playing different games until almost midnight. It was an absolute blast. We all were just too giddy as we laughed for hours. All this laughing made it hard to play some of the games at times. It was perfect.

We all departed just after midnight since Jason had an early flight this morning to get back home to Philadelphia. It was wonderful to see my friends whom have been away for so long.

So my social ineptness was overcome last night.

During our discussions throughout the night, many discussions included talk concerning Jason and his partner, George. I was amazed to hear Jason talk about his 2-year relationship with George. I was in awe just sitting there listening to how happy Jason is now in his life. Before Jason left town for medical school, he was not out to anyone. I didn't even learn about him being gay until Jenny (me best friend for all of you who don't already know) let it slip one night during our marathon-long phone conversations. Now to hear Jason so comfortable and happy with who he is in life made me smile like a kindergartener at nap time!

As I may have mentioned earlier, Jason was in town for a residency interview with one of the University's Internal Medicine clinics. Apparently, the reason he is looking around here is because George has a job prospect in the area as well. So they may be moving here. I am excited to meet George and to have him and Jason around here.

I can't think of what else I want to say about all of this. I just wanted to give you all the update into my social ineptness battle. Glad that I went after all. It was worth all the anxiety I had.

Good night, all!

Socially Inept???

Today, like so many days before, I feel socially inept!

It is hard to explain, but I don't like gathering in social settings. I have this uncomfortable feeling in the pit of my stomach, even when it is with a group of people I know.

For instance, tonight I am supposed to meet up at my friends Amy and Dave's house. We are supposed to get together because our friend, Jason, is coming into town for the weekend. None of us have seen him in several years since he left the area to attend medical school. He is in town this weekend for a residency interview. A number of other friends are gathering at Amy and Dave's house for a small party for Jason. 

I am wanting to go, but I have this sick feeling in my stomach. I am having some sort of anxiety attack just thinking about going to the party. 

Why is this happening to me? I am sure there are a series of explanations, but I can't pinpoint them. 

Just this past weekend I was in Greensboro, NC, visiting Jenny and her husband Chris. We all met up with Tamika and Dwayne to go see the Lion King on Tour. There was absolutely NO worries, NO sickness in my stomach, and NO hesitations! 

Is this just the repercussion of low self-esteem that has plagued me most of my life? Who knows? 

It remains to be seen if I will get up the nerve to go tonight or if I will stay hold-up in my house...

Finding It Difficult

I am sitting here tonight trying to fill out this application handed to me by my principal. I have been nominated for Teacher of the Year. I was in complete shock when she called me into her office and told me that my colleagues have nominated me.

I suppose the shock comes from the fact that I am my own worst critic. I am always finding places in improve. I just don't see myself as Teacher of the Year material. Please don't get me wrong, I am honored. I am just in denial.

I am having quite a hard time filling out this application. It is one thing for me to be out there in the community trying to help make the world a better place. It is another thing to talk about it all. I am supposed to write one page about my community involvement. Every time I start writing this I just stop in my tracks. It feels like I am bragging, and I HATE doing that more than anything else.

Why is this so difficult? Why do I have such a hard time talking about my work in this world?

Ugh! (That's the only reaction I can think of right now.)

Needed some music today, and I bought Amos Lee's new CD. It is awesome! 

Way to Go Kurt...I Mean Chris...You Know What I Mean!!!

I am sitting here watching the Golden Globe awards. I literally jumped out of my seat, did a bit of yelling, and applauded as Chris Colfer won the Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actor in a TV Series. Chris plays the out and proud Kurt Hummel on Glee.

Nothing more to say at this point!

My friend, Jason, posted this today on Facebook. It made me laugh.

Glad to know Bieber has a plan-B when his time in the spotlight has flickered out.